Copious amounts of caffeine do not seem to be having the intended effect of rousing me to full consciousness. In other words, I�m damn tired. And three cups of coffee and two diet cokes have done nothing to change that situation.
It probably won�t come as a big surprise to anyone that it�s Saturday morning and I�m at work. This means, of course, that I didn�t meet my deadline. Bench memos were supposed to be circulated yesterday. They weren�t. I�m still mired in my bitch of a complicated 7 weight case. Plus, I have an immigration case to finish.
I think I�ve worked out all of the issues of the bitchy-7-weight case in my head. I just need to reason them out in writing. Sometimes that�s easier said than done. It usually takes at least three times as long as I think it will. And, the way this case has been going, before I�m done its very likely that I�ll unearth another half dozen issues that the parties completely ignored.
As for the immigration case, would it be completely unprofessional to submit a concise bench memo that simply recommends that the law breaking assholes be sent back to the hell from which they escaped? Just like that. No legal reasoning. No analysis of the facts. Just this: I recommend that this panel send the law-breaking-assholes back to hell. I think that accurately sums up my professional legal opinion about the case. If I can get away with that one-sentence recommendation, then there�s a chance that I might get both memos done by Monday morning. Otherwise, I�m in for another shitty week.
And did I mention that I�m really damn tired this morning? I could probably lay my head on this desk and fall asleep. Damn tired.
Maybe I�ve chosen the wrong profession. I look around, and everyone else seems to get an occasional day off. Maybe, instead of a lawyer, I should have become a plumber. Nah. I don�t know the first thing about plumbing. Except that the last guy to snake my pipes was a hottie. Plus, I think I�d rather work weekends than to have to wade in other people�s shit.
Forget plumber, maybe I should have become a teacher. No. That wouldn�t have worked either. I have very little patience for idiocy. And I don�t think that my impatience (and, hence, annoyance) would be assuaged by the fact that the idiocy comes wrapped in smaller packages. And even though I know the world has its share of bright kids (wouldn�t the future be bleak if that weren�t true?), I still think that in a classroom of 30 or so students, the chances are pretty good that I�ll encounter at least one idiot (or at least an idiot in training). Plus, teachers have it really rough. I read one Diarylander was hit by one of her students this week. That bites. So, upon further consideration, I�d much rather work weekends than to go to a classroom where I�m sure to be assaulted, either by idiocy or by fists.
Hmm. My list of alternative careers is waning. Maybe I could be a stay at home mom? Wait. I have no children. I guess that pretty much eviscerates the �mom� part of being a stay at home mom. Plus, I�m single. So, if I�m staying at home, and there�s no one else around to go out of the home to earn a paycheck, starvation is almost guaranteed. I�m not really �in� to starvation. (As clearly evidenced by the complete failure of my ass-shrinkage plans.) So, it�s not surprising that I�d rather work weekends than starve. (I�m still not sure if I�d rather work weekends than change my motherhood status. I�ll have to reserve judgment on that for the time being.)
Well, I�m all out of ideas for alternative career choices. There�s no help for it. I�ll just have to stick out this �being a lawyer� thing a bit longer. At least until I die of over work or come up with a viable alternative. Since I�m stuck with this gig, I better get my very tired ass back to work now.
Listening To: R.E.M., "Everybody Hurts"
Reading: Alabama Power Co. v. Alabama Elec. Coop.
Feeling: tired. damn tired.