caminante haciendo camino
all locked up and ready to go
2004-08-12 | 3:30 p.m.

Well, there you have it. I�m all locked up. Hopefully this will cure the hesitation I�ve been feeling about writing here. To those that are here, thank you for wanting to read what I have to write.

Ok, let�s see. Where were we when we were so rudely interrupted by unwelcome eyes?

Ah, yes. Work.

As of today, I have 22 days of employment left. My stint as an exalted law clerk with a federal judge comes to an end on September 3rd.

�What next?� you may ask.

�I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA!!!� would be my anxiety-ridden response.

You heard right. I have no job to go to come September 7th.

The job with the federal prosecutorial agency is up and down, but mostly down. I received a call from Mr. Head Honcho about 3 weeks ago. He told me that I was one of a handful of final interviewees, out of over 500 applicants for the job, my resume was very impressive, my references couldn�t say enough good things about me, yada, yada, yada... �We decided to go with someone with more [read: any] trial experience.� Bastards.

After yelling, and crying, and throwing a few things, I resigned myself to the disappointing fact that I wasn�t going to be able to work for this particular agency. At least not until I garnered some trial experience. Just as I was getting used to the idea, I ran into Judge M2 who tells me that she is still advocating on my behalf behind the scenes. She said that there is a possibility that this agency will have a couple of positions open here in Phoenix (instead of Tucson like the job that I didn�t get) and that if that�s the case, she�s lobbying to get me into one of those slots.

So, although I�ve received the �thanks, but no thanks� from them, there is still a possibility (albeit a slim one) that something will pan out. Hence, the up and down part.

Seeing that the only deficiency in my resume is my lack of trial experience, I have proceeded with Plan B of Project Get A Damn Job. Namely, I�ve applied to the county prosecutor�s office. I have an interview on September 3rd. (Odd coincidence, I know.) If I get an offer from them, I wouldn�t be starting until mid-October.

So, unless something else happens, it looks as if I�m going to be on vacation (aka �unemployed�) for about 6 weeks.

Which, really, isn�t that bad. I can�t remember the last time I had a vacation. And, with all the work travel this year, I�m really looking forward to some uninterrupted down time at home.

Paying the bills might get tricky. But I�m sure I�ll work things out somehow.

I say that with such bravado. Truth is, I�m pretty damned stressed about the whole thing....not having a job, not getting the job I really wanted, not having an income for a while. Basically, I�m a �planner.� I get more than a little freaked out when I don�t have a plan. Right now I don�t have a plan beyond September 3rd and it�s freaking me right the hell out.

But, you know what? Just writing it down seems to lessen the anxiety somewhat. Damn, I missed this place. It�s good to be back, even if it�s under lock and key.



Listening To: nothing...except the traffic outside
Reading: nothing...although there's plenty here that I should be reading
Feeling: slightly less anxious

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